Unequal marriage?

How often do close relationships between two people (male and female) with a large age difference become the subject of discussion, speculation and sidelong glances? Yes, almost always. How is it so, if an aged man walks with a young lady, then she will certainly be seduced by his thick wallet. And he - "the demon in the ribs." The gossips are already sure that nothing good will come of such a marriage: well, the young woman will certainly wait for the old husband to “throw the skates” in order to famously dispose of the inheritance. Of course, this is in an exaggerated form, but nevertheless such assumptions have the right to exist, although they may turn out to be completely unfounded.

In fact, even for a couple of equal age there is no guarantee of maintaining a long-term relationship. However, many believe that an unequal marriage is doomed. This opinion is not accidental and is due to many factors.

Let's start from afar. In ordinary marriages, the age difference is 3-5 years and this is considered the norm. As a rule, a man is older than his wife, and this is justified to a certain extent: men become socially mature a little later than women, therefore, with a slight difference in age, spouses are approximately at the same stage of development. In couples where the spouse is 20-30 years older, there is a colossal difference not only in age, but also in worldview. However, they draw closer, because he is attracted to youth, freshness, innocence. Her experience, maturity, which create a sense of security, stability.

Reasons for the breakdown of relationships

An unequal marriage gives its participants what they lacked in their previous lives. As a rule, in girls, the craving for men much older than themselves is associated with certain psychological attitudes. Often a young lady is drawn to a mature man if she lacked a relationship with her father (who was not in the family), or the relationship was difficult, or she was simply used to being in the care of her parents and for a life free from her parents found a lover and a caring father in one person . The reasons may be different, but the essence is approximately clear.

As the years pass, the girl grows up, and it may turn out that she no longer needs support and support in the form of a mature husband. In the end, there are ambitions, a desire to show their leadership qualities. Secondly, an aging husband is not a very attractive prospect. (By the way, a girl living with a mature man unconsciously adapts to his age, so she looks older than her years). And this may well lead to a break in relations.

If you look at the situation from the side of the husband, then the man often wants to prove to himself that he is still “hoo”, or chooses a young lady in order to hide his complex of sexual insecurity. After all, the girl has not yet had time to taste the delights of relationships and is not spoiled at all (there is not much experience), so she certainly will not compare. Whereas a lady in her prime already knows a lot about intimate relationships and, perhaps, has certain requests for a partner. Sometimes to create a family with a young lady (in the sense that at the time of their conscious choice they can still be married).

The young wife, meanwhile, becomes not only an adornment of gray hair, but also plays the role of a mother. Well, of course, you need to please your husband and take care of him. In general, it is ideal if the wife combines all female roles. But then what is her charm, that is, she is no longer a lover, but rather a caring wife. In this scenario, the demon “hits” the rib a second time. This is where a seemingly happy relationship can end.

Options for the development of the situation may be different. But the point is that everyone subconsciously strives to satisfy their inner needs, and as soon as this happens, a conflict is brewing.

When a woman is older

When a woman is older in a couple (which is less common), a model is again formed: a mother and her child. Often with adult ladies there are young men who are notorious about intimate relationships. And the woman in the juice itself is just at the peak of her sexuality. Especially if her chosen one is very young and hypersexual. Why don't they stay together for a while? He is gaining experience, she is for him both a mother and an experienced teacher in an intimate relationship. But over time, the student grows up, wants to be a leader in alliance with a woman, and at that moment the relationship ends. The young man needs to develop further.

However, any relationship has the right to exist. It doesn't matter if there is an age difference or not. The main thing is that people have common interests when sexual relations are on the decline. Because if they had nothing in common except for sex, then the ending is predictable. But the birth of children is very conducive to the continuation. So "unequal marriage" has a good chance, as, indeed, and all the rest.